Healing My Burning Emotional Body

Through the power of music

I knew I was not going to be able to sleep.

My body felt like it was on fire.

It was 2:15 am.

I had just finished a challenging conversation with my partner.

We discovered a growth opportunity in how to communicate.

While I was happy with what we uncovered, I knew I needed to shift my environment to relax.

Adding music into the mix was the key to help my body to calm down from my emotional overwhelm the conversation had created.

I searched around in our house for my phone and my headphones.

I plopped myself onto the couch.

Popped my headphones on.

And pressed play:

My eyes were closed the whole time I listened.

My lower lip trembled.

My jaw unlatched.

I already felt so much better.

I could tell I needed to cry.

Letting my playlist carry me, the next song came on:

As Tierra played, I sang along in a quiet voice.

My favorite line of this song is:

Perdónalos, porque no saben

Que están buscando poder en vez de amor

Which translates to:

Forgive them, for they do not know

That they are seeking power instead of love.

This line always reminds me of the infinite grace.

Which we all have towards others.

Therefore we have the capacity for it towards ourselves.

We must remember to grant ourselves this grace.

This can take the form of allowing ourself the space to process emotions, even when it means singing in the middle of the night.

Since beginning my plant medicine journey, music with chanting has been uplifting to me.

I skipped one of my favorite songs on the playlist, and let the following song play:

I could feel myself opening up.

I cried gently.

So much gratitude for the release.

My favorite song to sing along to played next, setting off full body tingles as I sang:

I was in a state of pure happiness.

The tears of overwhelm transitioned to those of joy and beauty.

I felt there was a final door to unlock at this point.

The initial wall blocking release was destroyed.

The joyful flow from pure expression.

The final release was ready.

Have you ever heard chimes?

Not wind chimes.

But chimes in the hands of a skilled musician?

Sound baths after meditation and yoga class are one environment you hear them.

At the end of an Ayahuasca ceremony, the sound of the chimes is a gentle guide into the final relaxation.

I picked:

My face contorted from smiling into soft sobs and back again.

My body swayed back and forth to the music.

Writing this with the song playing and reflecting sets off goosebumps all over my body.

The feeling of glossy eyes.

Neither sad nor happy.

Just in touch with a strong emotional state.

The fire all over my body had cooled.

I was okay.